It's a story which I believe could help other people through the difficult experience of a failed marriage. And the truth is, my story is not unique as they say that 50% of marriages in America end in divorce. Each story has it's own set of circumstances. But no matter the circumstances, pain is still involved in the process. And there is pain enough to go around to all parties - and the kids as well.
One book that I read during that time spoke of the two parties as "the dumper" and "the dumped". The "dumper" is the one who does something which causes the relationship to break apart. While the "dumped" is the one who is left behind feeling mostly like the victim. I wrote my story from the perspective of the "dumped". That's what I experienced. I was dumped.
Let me skip right to a key point in my experience. I was sitting on the front deck of my ex-sister in law's home, overlooking a pond. As the sun shone down on me I began to feel like "You're going to make it, Vern. You're going to make it through this." At that instant, I also had another idea go through my mind. The idea was a KEY, a real physical KEY. I heard the words "You hold the KEY to your healing, Vern." I guess I had been looking to my ex to bring my healing. Maybe, I expected my kids to bring me healing. But the KEY really was me. It wasn't me alone. It was me and my relationship with God. Better said -- it was God's relationship with me. After all, God is the one who initiated the work He has done in my life. I can take no credit for it.
Let me close this blog with some words that Paul wrote which I have found so comforting at many instances in my life. (Colossians 1:27) "Christ in you, the hope of glory". Read this in its context and let me know how you're affected by it. Perhaps God will help you through some difficult days in your life. Maybe, God will bring healing to you in some way. He has me and He continues that work.